Professor Snape's Twin peaks encounter
by Kala
Summary: Snape pushes Fred & George too much, with interesting results. r/r please.


Disclaimer: I am not committing character theft - all characters are the property of J.K. Rowling.  
  
Fred twirled his wand lazily in Snape's classroom. Snape was wandering around as usual, sneering at the Gryffindor's potions. "Ms Spinnet you were supposed to add the frog brain before the gray fennel!"  
  
"Does it make a difference Professor?" Alicia asked. "You weren't very specific when you told us, you just said to mix in all the ingredients."  
  
"Ten points from Gryffindor," Snape snapped.  
  
Alicia knew better than to complain, if she did a detention would be coming her way faster than the Hogwart's Express. Snape was in an even fouler mood than usual today. In fact he was one blood vessel short of apoplexy.  
  
"Ah yes. The Twin terrors. May I know why you are not brewing your potion?" Snape loomed over Fred and George's cauldron.  
  
"That would be because we are finished. Sir." George and Fred said simultaneuosly, and then saluted Snape, grinning cheekily. They were often like that, knowing exactly what the other was going to do.  
  
Snape was not impressed. He pulled out his wand and gestured sharply. Fred and George were suddenly lifted up by an invisible force, which threw them back and pinned them to the wall. Fred's wand clattered to the floor. "I am sick of your attitudes. You dare to laze about in my class, wasting time and being smart about it! Clearly you need a lesson in manners, and unfortunately for you I will be the one to teach you." He brandished his wand at them.  
  
The class were watching Snape with shock. They all knew he loathed all students except Slytherins, but he had never magically attacked anyone before, or lost his temper like this.  
  
The twins, however did not look fazed at his threat. "Let us go," Fred said angrily.  
"NOW," George finished.  
  
Snape looked venomous. "Or you'll do what, you little shits?"  
  
George whipped out his own wand. This was one of the moments when he and Fred seemed to be connected, knowing what to do and what the other needed. "Accio!" he cried. Fred's wand lept back into Fred's hands, but even as it was flying through the air Snape was raising his own wand, no doubt about to curse them thoroughly. Years of playing pranks and getting away with them had honed the twin's reflexes. George threw another spell before Snape had even finished his. "Expelliarmus!" Snape was thrown back several feet, his wand skittering away. The twins dropped to the floor. Both of them gestured with their wands, simultaneously yelling "Perpetua-Engorgiotorso-Infinito!" Blue sparks flew from their wands and struck Snape in the chest. To everyone's astonishment, Snape's chest swelled like an out of control balloon. In a few seconds, his robe had torn apart and his breasts would have given Pamela Anderson a run for her money. The twins were not finished yet. Once again they raised their wands in unison, shouting, "Perpetua-Shrillresanato-Infinito!" This time there did not seem to be any visual difference to him.   
  
Snape struggled to get up of the floor, attempting to cover his massive bosom at the same time, amid gales of laughter from the class. He seized his wand, pointed to himself and cried "Finite Incantatem!" Nothing happened however. "What have you done!?" he raged, pointing his wand at them. Something odd had occurred however. Snape's voice had changed, from his usual slimy tone, to a very soft, very high, very feminine tone. "My voice! Aiiiiiieeee!!" Snape's high pitched squeal caused the class to fall into another cackling fit. Unable to withstand the humiliation any longer, Snape ran out of the classroom.   
  
Lee Jordan asked amidst the laughter, "That was brilliant! Where did you two learn those spells from!?"  
  
"We found an old spell book in the restricted part of the library, it was called 'Spells for the Jokers'," Fred replied.  
  
George grinned and picked up where his twin left off, "of course we had to look into it. It had heaps of stuff, although all of them were really complicated - those two were the only ones we could learn before that old librarian tracked us down and took back the book. We had to practise them on each other, then used Finite Incantatem to reverse the effect."  
  
"Then how come Finite Incantatem didn't work for Snape?" he asked.  
  
"The joiner spells we used with them - Perpetua and Infinito made it so that only we could undo the spells. They were even harder to learn, and they only work on certain Charms."  
  
"You two are in deep when Snape tells Dumbledore though," Angelina warned them....  



End file.
